Mama said…

Mamma didn’t tell me

He would make my breath stop

My heart would skip a beat

My words would disappear

That i would get hot

Mamma didn’t warn me

That he would control my emotions

That foreign feelings would become natural

That my world would seem insignificant

That my body would tremble with aftershock

Mamma didn’t say

That i would trust instinctively

That my eyes would dance in a sweet melody

That my body would respond in this way

That his baritone would make me weak

Mamma didn’t show me

How to live without him

How to control myself in his presence

How to prepare for when he becomes an important part of me

How this would change me forever

But mamma did tell me

“One day baby you will see, all about this thing called love, and what happened to me…”

Our Fairytale

I never fully understood it, until today, until now, as i’m thinking about it…

The media really does set us up to fail.

Countless bedtime stories, television programmes, disney movies that i have watched…

That paint the image of ‘happily ever after’. A Fairytale. Your perfect prince charming. A flawless princess. Your castle. Wealth. An abundance of happiness surrounding you.

I want that. Who doesn’t?

And so it’s sold.

A dream. Your dream that ‘WILL’ become you reality.

But in reality, LIFE is not a fairytale.

You have arguments, you experiences deaths, you have money issues, you love and you hate, you have redundancies, recessions, make mistakes…

And guess what?

THAT is life.

Then we have the magazines, blogs, gossip, radio stations…

All ostracising people for having those difficulties.

Experiences that are not as rare as we are made to believe, or feel.

We go into relationships blind sighted. Unrealistic expectations of what WORK it actually takes to make it WORK.

So many relationships end because we encounter situations like those mentioned, which we have been conditioned early on into thinking is not ‘normal’.

And so, we seek a normality that is contrived.

There has been many occasions where i have sought to find someone who can relate to my problem, an issue i’m experiencing, someone with a problem like mine, or has relationship issues like mine…

But i struggle to find it because everyone wants to create an image of perfection when it does not exist.

We are scared, worried, ashamed to admit our difficulties, or ask for advice or help because what we are experiencing, according to the media, is ‘not supposed to happen’.

And so relationships break down.

Divorces becoming more common than marriage counselling.

This needs to STOP. 

It can only start AND stop, with YOU.

After all, there is reason most fairy tales start with ‘in a land far far far away!!!!’